Characteristics Of ACOAs

Employees of Wealth & Power Addicts

a. We became isolated and afraid of rich people and authority figures

b. We became approval seekers and lost our identity in the process

c. We are frightened by angry bosses and angry at personal criticism

d. We either become alcoholics, marry them, or both, or find another compulsive personality such as a powerholic or moneyholic to fulfill our abandonment needs

e. We live life from the viewpoint of victims and are attracted by that weakness in our love and friendship relations

f. We have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility and it is easier for us to be concerned with others rather than ourselves. This enables us not to look too closely at our faults, etc.

g. We get guilt feelings when we stand up for ourselves instead of giving in to others

h. We became addicted to excitement

i. We confuse love and pity and tend to "love" people we can "pity" and "rescue"

j. We have stuffed our feelings from our traumatic childhoods and have lost the ability to feel or express our feelings because it hurts so much (DENIAL)

k. We judge ourselves harshly and have a very low sense of self-esteem

l. We are dependent personalities who are terrified of loss of wealth and/or power and will do anything to hold on to it

m. W & P addiction is also family disease and as children we took on the characteristics of that disease even though we did not have any power ourselves.

Children of Addicted Parents

The following are some of the characteristics, agreed upon by one Alanon-Acoa group.

a. We became isolated and afraid of people and authority figures

b. We became approval seekers and lost our identity in the process

c. We are frightened by angry people and any personal criticism

d. We either become alcoholics, marry them, or both, or find another compulsive personality such as a workaholic to fulfill our sick abandonment needs

e. We live life from the viewpoint of victims and are attracted by that weakness in our love and friendship relations

f. We have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility and it is easier for us to be concerned with others rather than ourselves. This enables us not to look too closely at our faults, etc.

g. We get guilt feelings when we stand up for ourselves instead of giving in to others

h. We became addicted to excitement

i. We confuse love and pity and tend to "love" people we can "pity" and "rescue"

j. We have stuffed our feelings from our traumatic childhoods and have lost the ability to feel or express our feelings because it hurts so much(DENIAL)

k. We judge ourselves harshly and have a very low sense of self-esteem

l. We are dependent personalities who are terrified of abandonment and will do anything to hold on to a relationship in order not to experience painful abandonment feelings which we received from living with sick people who were never there emotionally for us

m. Alcoholism is a family disease and we became para-alcoholics and took on the characteristics of that disease even though we did not pick up the drink.